Buy  STITCH IN TIME —Seattle’s Capitol Hill has long been in need of a crafts store. Finally, those with passions for fuzzy fabrics and funky flavored yarn can indulge at the newly opened fabric and sewing notions supply store Stitches. Find friendly helpful service, and fabric of all kinds; knitting and crocheting classes are available. 711 E Pike, Seattle. Street stitchesseattle.com.

Wear  TOILET HUMOR —My friend Timothy has the greatest t-shirt that you all will never own. It’s one of those cryptic boobie tees with two toilet paper rolls covering your boobs, but the funny thing about the shirt is that the paper rolls sit up about three inches from his neck. He also has another one that says, “Please don’t squeeze the Charmin, squeeze me instead.” That one has Mr. Whipple’s face on it. Good grief!!.

Eat  NOT YOUR DADDY'S FREEDOM FRIES —Screw the Atkins Diet. For more than your daily intake of carbohydrates, nothing beats a big order of pomme frites from Frites on Seattle’s Capitol Hill. Not only have the owners taken care to create a cute little Belgian-themed interior, but the fries are pretty hearty. For $4 (the medium size), you get a funnel full of hot potatoes along with several kinds of dipping sauces—pesto mayo, tzatziki or BBQ, for starters. It’s cash only, so bring your appetite. Frites is located in the Neumo’s building on 10th and Pike. Open 12:30pm-2:30am, Tuesday-Saturday. Closed on Sunday and Mondays.

Activate  SOUND AND FURY — Rolling Thunder events have been going on for a few years now and always attract some great speakers and politically minded entertainers. The Rolling Thunder Democracy Festival on Saturday, July 31 is a giant meet-up and networking opportunity. Held at Magnuson Park, the event will features author Jim Hightower (a Texan Michael Moore), William Rivers Pitt of truthout.com, Paula Maya, Saul Landau, and many others. Volunteers are also needed for this event. For more information, visit seattlethunder.net, e-mail mike55@foxinternet.com or call 206.623.1179.

Hear  AM RADIO LIVES — Dressing like an indie Village People and sounding like a disco-fied T. Rex was enough to hook us. The Scissor Sisters are going to blow up the States this summer and wouldn’t it be nice to be one of the first to say you caught them when they still played the danciest version of “Comfortably Numb” you’ve ever heard? July 22 at Neumo’s in Seattle and July 23 at Berbati’s Pan in Portland.

Surf  HYGIENE HYJINKS — With the current political state, even people who wouldn’t normally care about politics are talking about the Bush regime’s mismanagement of our country. Alan Blevins is one of these non-politically minded college students who took it upon himself to create a set of essays detailing why John Kerry is a douche bag, but Alan is voting for him anyway. This must be the longest URL we’ve discovered yet. johnkerryisadouchebagbutim-votingforhimanyway.com