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You've seen us on the streets of Capitol Hill, the U. District, and Wallingford. Yes, you've seen us in our white shirts and ties in the summer. When winter comes, you've seen us in our hoodies and cardigans. We permeate the city. We are all around you. We could be your friend, your neighbor, a relative or even a co-worker. If you live in the Seattle area chances are you've known one of us—chances are you've loved one of us—chances are you are one of us. That's right, I'm talking about Landmark Theater employees.
We are very selective about who joins our ranks. You are obviously highly intelligent and creative with a possible penchant for alcohol. Most likely you know someone on the inside. You will quickly make new friends with your fellow co-workers, and soon Landmark will be the only social circle that you need. At phase one, you will start to familiarize yourself with the job and your co-workers. You may hear the names of other co-workers that you do not know—do not be alarmed.
After several months you will know your theater and all of the employees there. You will learn and start to use the various perks available to you. Also, you will become familiar with the names and faces of the regular customers. This is phase two. At phase three you will start to see how the various theaters are interconnected. Fellow employees at phase three or above will most likely entrust you with their first hand ghost encounters at the Neptune or the Harvard Exit. They may also inform you which co-workers made out at the SIFF party last year. You will start to learn the names and faces of all the Landmark managers and employees, and you may even take a shift at a theater other than your home theater.
At phase four you are fully accepted as part of the family. We know all about your life, and the embarrassing story of when you got drunk at a midnight screening and danced in front of the screen with your top off is now infamous. You will now be rooming with or dating one of your co-workers. At this stage you may be asked to join management. If you do not choose to move up to management you will stay on part-time for several years or go on to SIFF. Another option, although not many choose this, would be to bounce to SIFF in the spring and back again when festival time is over.
It is pointless to think about leaving. All of your friends are here. The best free movies are here. If you leave you will be cutting yourself off from a great community of artists and independent scholars. If you must go we will not stop you. After you are gone your legend will live on in the stories that we will tell.
CULTOMETER
Uniforms: 8
Charismatic Leader: 0
Devotion of Followers: 7
Group Rituals: 6
Overall: 8
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