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10 Things We Loved About 2012

From Les Miz to anti-Semitic Elmo, the year’s top 10 most Tattler things—none of them (sadly) NSFW

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Fantine (Anne Hathaway) and Jean Valjean (Hugh Jackman) in Les Misérables. (Universal Pictures)

It’s been such a horrible week, full of unbearably horrible questions. I’ve never been more grateful that I don’t have to think of answers to any of them. This column, from its inception, has been a strictly frivolous enterprise, with any profundity of insight it may generate being entirely accidental. I’m not saying this to be self-deprecating; if the events of the past several days have taught us anything, it’s that shallowness has its place—one can’t help in moments like these but think of that immortal post-Sept. 11 Onion headline: “A Shattered Nation Longs To Care About Stupid Bullshit Again.”

So, rather than spend the next 900 words or so wading into some unnavigable debate about gun control or mental illness or violent video games or some heartbreaking combination of the three, I will focus here, as is my wont, on the ridiculous, the glib, the hysterical, the inane. Sometimes you can’t listen to any more weeping parents, or you don’t feel like holding your kids tighter. Sometimes you just need to laugh at something random on the Internet.

So, in that spirit, Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you Tattler’s top 10 most Tattler things of the year!

***

10. Anything and everything Les Misérables-related

A movie musical as crowd-pleasing and long in the making as this one, to be released Dec. 25 on what I have hereby decreed “Les Miz-mas,” was always going to be a big deal, but nothing could have prepared us for the swelling deluge of material that millions of former drama geeks reliving their childhood have unleashed on the Internet over the past two months. Want to see a baby dressed as Javert? No problem! Various incarnations of nerdy-chic movie stars singing “Confrontation”? Go forth, my son! Anne Hathaway has been burning up the television lately in an array of edgy outfits she looks vaguely uncomfortable in, grinning manically as she gives us all the dirt on everything from her historically accurate starvation diet (utter emaciation being the preferred form of uncompromising vérité for female Hollywood stars) to how seeing her mother play Fantine as a child inspired her to become an actress. Never before have so many put so much effort into something so ultimately inconsequential. It’s dizzying, it’s ridiculous, and it is glorious. You’ll forgive me for using this space to feature my own humble contribution to the genre (feel free to sing on your way to the theater with the Horowitzes this year):

Have yourself a merry old Les Miz-mas
Skip the caroling
This year stand in line to hear the people sing

Have yourself a merry old Les Miz-mas
Storm the barricades
Much like
Rent with syphilis instead of AIDS

See us all in the older days
Dark and colder days
In France

Russell Crowe slowly goes insane n’
There’s Redmayne in
Tight pants

Dream a dream you’ll soon be disabused of
Get the Yuletide blues
At the multiplex you’ll know just what to choose
So have yourself a merry old Les Miz-mas, Jews

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lcsterling says:

It’s “Les Mis.”

Les Misérables (pron.: /leɪ ˈmɪzərɑːb/ or /leɪ ˌmɪzəˈrɑːb/; French pronunciation: ​[le mizeˈʁablə]), colloquially known as Les Mis or Les Miz /leɪ ˈmɪz/…

Whatevs, you purists. This was a delightful and lol inspiring column! //sings Les Miz as she stands in line on Xmas day in frigging Utah with the goys//

Posted under my husband’s name accidental. Sorry. Sheryl Hussien Ginsberg

lcsterling says:

It’s French. No “z” in Les Misérables — only in the phonetics.

Miha Ahronovitz says:

How did Rachel miss the orthodox Jews dancing Gangam Style at a wedding in Israel? http://bit.ly/UVSJgj

Isaac Ben says:

Funny :)

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10 Things We Loved About 2012

From Les Miz to anti-Semitic Elmo, the year’s top 10 most Tattler things—none of them (sadly) NSFW