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Personal History

In the Rough

An illustrator gets affianced and her thoughts zoom from wanting an engagement ring to worrying it symbolizes that she’ll be her man’s property

By Vanessa Davis|December 16, 2011 7:00 AM|Comments:
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Vanessa Davis' most recent book, Make Me a Woman, includes many comic strips first published in Tablet Magazine. Her first collection of diary comics, Spaniel Rage, was published in 2005.
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Alia says:
December 16, 2011
1:38 PM

Mazal tov Vanessa and Trevor!
I’ve been married 17 years and I never once thought of my engagement ring as a proof of purchase. BUT I did live without one for several months because we got engaged spontaneously and I didn’t want to seem “greedy.” I wrote about it here: http://njjewishnews.com/tribe/2011/05/20/present-tense/
Trust me, in an engagement and a marriage, navigating the engagement ring is the easy part! Good luck, and much love!

brezhnev says:
December 16, 2011
1:46 PM

I don’t know where the engagement ring thing came from, but I’m Russian(-American), and no one in Russia gives engagement rings. I wonder if it’s only an American tradition…

Atara says:
December 16, 2011
2:50 PM

ah the question so many of us pondered. i’ve been married for 5 years, and did not get an engagement ring, but i do wear a plain band in the tradition of jewish wedding rings. people told me “oh you’ll regret this decision” telling me not to be so anti-diamond….but i just didnt like the hype around it and i am really not a wearer of jewelry. my wedding band is the first ring i’ve ever worn….

sara kazemi says:
December 16, 2011
10:56 PM

<3 this

Katie says:
December 17, 2011
1:26 AM

mazl tov! also you were pretty kind with prince william’s hair. ;)

Marc says:
December 22, 2011
9:50 AM

Speaking from the guy point of view, I see it as the first real test for the groom: is he able to let her decide on what to do, and more importantly is he able to decipher what she means, even if it is not what she says.

i.e.:
“I don’t want a ring” (I want a BIG ring)

“We should have a small, intimate wedding” (200 people is small right?)

Ultimately, it is further proof that God invented women because he owned stock in Seagram’s.

marjorie says:
December 27, 2011
6:07 PM

aw, mazel tov, vanessa!!!!

this made me laugh and made me happy.

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In the Rough

An illustrator gets affianced and her thoughts zoom from wanting an engagement ring to worrying it symbolizes that she’ll be her man’s property