Samuel L. Jackson, wearing a gray t-shirt and a silly hat that only Samuel L. Jackson could make look cool, was walking down Fifth Avenue yesterday when he saw a throng of people marching in a parade to celebrate Israel. Being Samuel L. Jackson, Samuel L. Jackson did the sort of thing that had made Samuel L. Jackson the godfather of badassery, namely turning around, taking a cool selfie, and posting it to Twitter.
What happened next will not amaze you: almost immediately, a flurry of followers began yowling, most of them sounding like that unbalanced character in a Samuel L. Jackson movie that prompts Samuel L. Jackson to shoot off that angry look and then tear into a super-cool monologue rich with catchphrases. “#apartheid #rape #babykillers” wrote one fan of both Samuel L. Jackson and nuance, while supporters of the Jewish state jumped on the thread to denounce such anti-Semitic drivel and, more importantly, cheer on Samuel L. Jackson.
Like all good Samuel L. Jackson cameos, Samuel L. Jackson delivered his line and then went silent, leaving the screen to the blathering of characters far less interesting than Samuel L. Jackson. Which is a shame: Samuel L. Jackson could have roared at least once more to counter the haters’ heinous accusations, maybe something about how the path of the righteous man being is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. I bet that would’ve sounded cool.
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