Ruthless Viewing

For those of us who are forced to make a living in Hollywood, it’s impossible not to be hyperaware, sometime during September and October, when everyone tends to be on their pious best behavior. We are courteous and careful, knowing that all too soon, decisions about their ultimate fates will be issued from on high that will declaim who shall live and who shall die, who shall flourish and who shall limp along, badly maimed…until put out of their pathetic misery. No, it’s not the High Holidays I’m talking about—it’s the fall TV premiere season.

During this time, networks puts forth their new shows and, in most cases, they’ll soon be handed a swift and terrible verdict: cancellation. It’s solemn, it’s terrifying, and unless you’re an actor on a juice cleanse, fasting doesn’t help deal with the stress of losing a job you were really counting on. It’s the book of life, adjusted for ratings, and it is merciless.

So perhaps it makes sense that a distinct Old Testament flavor seems to have seeped into several of television’s latest offerings. After years of swinging back and forth between heroes and anti-heroes (and even more extreme antiheroes) we’ve finally stumbled upon the most driven, volatile, and unforgiving protagonist/antagonist of all: the mercurial God of the Hebrews.

He’s there in his most literal form in ABC’s upcoming Of Kings and Prophets, an epic re-telling of the story of King David (and tellingly, it was pulled from the fall schedule so that the pilot can be reshot), wherein the various sinister ravings of the prophet Samuel, who is not a particularly cuddly figure, is played by the Israeli-Arab actor Mohammad Bakri. (If I remember the pilot correctly, Samuel is generally filthy, wild-eyed, and streaked with the entrails of animals he has just sacrificed. Eat your heart out, Walter White!)

Then there’s American Horror Story: Hotel, the latest installment in Ryan Murphy’s Technicolor, blood-drenched, David La Chapelle-fantasy pastiche come to life, which promises to feature a “Ten Commandments Killer,” who murders those who are guilty of various core prohibitions—the inaugural victims are a pair of adulterers (Which Thou Shalt Not Commit!) who are subjected to something truly horrifying involving a superglue, a set of crucifixion nails, and Viagra. The Ten Commandments themselves are helpfully included in flickering neon art deco lettering in the opening credits, in case you need a refresher.

But for my money, the most wrathful Old Testament patriarch to be seen on prime time TV this fall is the inimitable Lucious Lyon, the ruthless record label mogul played with chilling conviction by Terrence Howard, the star of Fox’s megahit and bona fide cultural phenomenon Empire. Capricious and obsessed with slights, utterly assured of this own omnipotence, endlessly categorizing the various ways his children have failed him, Lucious interacts with and thinks of his family like the God of Exodus with his prophets. Is Andre, the firstborn son and Harvard MBA, going to save the company and give Lucious his first grandchild? Perhaps, but maye not, since he hates his father because he’s crazy and he’s trying to use family to his advantage; Does Jamal, the second son, a musical prodigy, have the business acumen to match? Maybe, but he’s also lain with another man, which makes him an abomination to be put in a trash can (a core wound that is constantly revisited throughout the series.) Did you lead the Israelites through the desert for forty years? Well, you hit that rock when I told you just to talk to it, so you’re out of luck, buddy, goes Lucious; thinking.

It’s the ultimate logline that’s been running for three thousand years—only on TV: An all-powerful father figure who withholds his love and approval until his flock reaches peak perfectibility, and who is utterly willing to ruin their lives in the process should it suit. God only knows what the residuals are like. And God only knows which shows will stick around the help their creators and staff pay off their mortgages. So I suppose we should leave it in his hands.

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