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Men Like Jewish Women, Especially if They’re Naked

‘Details’ uncovers shocking trend

by
Hadara Graubart
December 01, 2009

Well, Jewish ladies, according to Details magazine, we’ve made it onto an illustrious list that also includes the following: “Cheerleaders. Five-inch heels. Big, natural boobs.” That’s right, we’re a fetish! Wait, you knew that already? Of course you did. After all, as Details points out, “Jews are comparatively cool about sex.” In fact, says the mag, “Rabbis exhort their congregants to get busy on Shabbat, telling them it’s a ‘double mitzvah.’” Now, we’ve heard that before, but, curiously, never from a rabbi—rather, from the kind of creeps who write emails like the one received by the leader of Kinky Jews: “I never regretted not being Jewish so much as when I saw your profile.” If you need more proof of our increasing hotness, there’s a Jewish porn star who “checks in with her mother more than is strictly necessary,” and a calendar featuring pictures of a nude woman “blowing the ram-horn shofar, bathing in a tub of bagels, and covering her D-cups with strategically placed matzo balls and latkes” that, shock of shocks, “was a hit on a USO tour of Iraq.” And, of course, there’s “the popularity of ‘Frum porn,’ raunchy photos of religious Jews getting busy.”

Although a blogger on Jezebel notes, “I invite you to find a subset of the population that porn has not at one point or another fetishized,” that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t rejoice in our status. Ladies, let’s throw on those cheerleader uniforms, get us some “goyfriends,” and take over the world!

Hadara Graubart was formerly a writer and editor for Tablet Magazine.