Regarding the Iranian physicist who was killed in a bomb blast in Tehran a few days ago, President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad has a theory: the Jews did it. It’s not impossible, or even implausible, that Israel, or the United States, or some Western interest, launched the assassination in order to slow Iran’s nuclear program—a Haaretz columnist posited this yesterday. But Ahmadinejad is not theorizing—he has rigorous scientific proof. The physicist, you see, was killed in the “Zionist style”: “The depth of the enemies’ grudge can be seen in the university professor’s assassination,” he said. “The manner of bomb planting shows a Zionist style and they want to make sure that Iran would not advance.”
What exactly is he saying? Does this mean the killers arrived in Palestine around the turn of the last century to reclaim the land and establish a socialist utopia … and then planted the bomb? Did they work by day at their high-tech start-up, party by night in Tel Aviv’s clubs … and then plant the bomb? Or maybe Ahmadinejad is referring not to Israel but to the underground city of Zion from the Matrix movies? Or the Zion of the Bob Marley song “Zion Train”?
Either way, only time will tell whether Israel’s Zionist style is any match for Iran’s crouching-cricket kung fu style.
Related: Iran Scientist Likely Killed By Opponents of Nuclear Program [Haaretz]