Last most of us left little Jonathan Lipnicki, he had wheezed his way into our hearts as Renée Zellweger’s asthmatic bespectacled philosopher-son in Jerry Maguire. He made us laugh, he made us cry, he coined numerous catch-phrases, and delivered an Academy Award into the undeserving hands of Cuba Gooding, Jr. by helping to make Jerry Maguire a box office smash. But then, he disappeared, playing mostly cameos on television and returning to his childhood home to pursue a normal teenage life.
Today the Daily Mail (next to its Iran nuke coverage) ran a profile of Lipnicki some fifteen years after his breakout role. And the results are sort of frightening.
A small list of observations from the article:
• The diminutive kid who once exhorted Tom Cruise to comprehend that the human head weighs eight pounds can now dead-lift about 50 times that weight.
• He tattooed a huge Star of David on his abs, which makes us wonder whether or not the choice of Lipnicki as the neurotic, gawkish, weakling archetype in both Jerry Maguire and Stuart Little didn’t have some anti-Semitic force behind it.
• Jonathan Lipnicki is now a blue belt in jujitsu.
• He is planning a Hollywood comeback.
Hollywood doesn’t deserve him. Clearly Lipnicki should be sent on a mission to Iran to sabotage its nuclear program.