Like New York, I’m Voting For Hillary

After Hillary Clinton soundly defeated Bernie Sanders in the New York Primary (a result that surprised no one except the many, many guys on Facebook—a disturbing number of whom I’ve slept with—who keep posting the same three polls from websites no one has ever heard of mansplaining why a Jewish Socialist from Vermont, who has as yet to receive one drop of the mud the GOP would gleefully sling at him should he actually win the nomination, is somehow more electable than one of the most famous and powerful women on the planet), the calls from all quarters for the Bernmeister to drop out of the election have grown, if not quite deafening, than politely suggestive.

Clinton–wisely, given how such a demand would be immediately used against her in the media and beyond–has declined to add her voice to this chorus. Sanders and his surrogates, meanwhile, seem determined to take their fight and their populist message all the way to the convention, even if, Sanders campaign manager Jeff Weaver has claimed, that means subverting the will of the people by wooing the oft-maligned Democratic super-delegates. I would like to take this opportunity to say that after 16 years of voting in presidential elections, I still have never met a super-delegate, have no idea how you become one, or even exactly what they are.

No matter. I made my mind up a long time ago about who I am going to vote for in the California Democratic primary, should it still be remotely relevant by the time it rolls around sometime in 2018, I think? I didn’t find the decision particularly onerous, given that I am old and grizzled and cynical, and my old, grizzled, cynical self has come to realize over time that you can generally affect the most change by working at least somewhat from inside the system, and also that having to occasionally compromise your ideals means that you have on at least one occasion accomplished something that made the compromise worth it.

But for those of you having a more difficult time with the real Jewish Question (I’m a democratic socialist! But I don’t really want to pay that much in tax just when I’ve started to actually make some real money!) I would like to direct you to this video by Rachel Sweeney, AKA Anger Girl, who interrogates this classically Talmudic Puzzle while dressed as Yentl to the tune of “Papa, Can You Hear Me?” (And yes, I realize this is the third time I’ve written about Yentl in two weeks, but is there ever really a bad time to write about Yentl?)

Let your soul be illuminated by the flicker of her single Shabbat candle in that clearing in the Polish woods, as you have been commanded to become a light unto the nations. And as Sweeney sings, no matter what you decide: Everything is hazier/And Donald Trump seems crazier.