(Eric Molinsky)

Suppose you’re in the office of a certain Talmudic scholar, and you come across a book with the following text, originally found inscribed, in Aramaic, in a bowl in ancient Babylonia:

I am standing on the shore of the sea, on the shore of the great river
To the nighthawk and the bird
I am saying, I am asking him:

I adjure you, great bird of rivers
That you may hear my words
And accept my incantation

Do you:

A) Politely return the book to the shelf and continue with your visi;
B) Enroll in a PhD program in Aramaic Studies;
C) Build some masonry domes in San Francisco and write a raft of songs.

Jewlia Eisenberg, of the band Charming Hostess, will tell you which option she chose in Monday’s Vox Tablet podcast, which you can preview by clicking below: