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Donald Trump addresses the Republican Jewish Coalition at Ronald Reagan Building and International Trade Center December 3, 2015 in Washington, DC. Alex Wong/Getty Images
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The Five Best Explanations for Why Donald Trump Wore a Jewish Prayer Shawl at a Church Event on Saturday

We leave the gentiles alone for just one day and stuff like this happens

by
Yair Rosenberg
September 04, 2016
Alex Wong/Getty Images
Donald Trump addresses the Republican Jewish Coalition at Ronald Reagan Building and International Trade Center December 3, 2015 in Washington, DC. Alex Wong/Getty Images

Yesterday, on the Jewish Sabbath, Donald Trump spoke at a nondenominational church in Detroit, in an attempt to reach out to African-American voters. Analysts have since debated whether the address and its message might improve Trump’s abysmal poll numbers among black voters. But we’re more interested in how this happened:

Here are the five most reasonable explanations for this incident, in order of truthfulness:

5. The event was held under the auspices of a philo-Semitic church, which has adopted some Jewish rituals, and whose pastor gave the Jewish prayer shawl to Trump.

4. Trump thought the disguise would get him into our secret meetings. (It won’t.)

3. Trump was trying to rustle up a minyan for Mincha.

2. Trump was finally embracing his role as a fringe candidate.

1. Trump wanted to put on tefillin (phylacteries), but they didn’t have any that fit his tiny, tiny hands.

Whatever the explanation, we’re sending thoughts and prayers to pro-Trump Nazi Twitter at this trying time.

Yair Rosenberg is a senior writer at Tablet. Subscribe to his newsletter, listen to his music, and follow him on Twitter and Facebook.