The Week In Rear View is back, baby. Only spring break could stop me from delivering the goods, and by the goods, I mean Jews in the news.

Mahmoud Abbas says that David Friedman is super lame: Not quite. The Palestinian Authority president actually called the American ambassador to Israel a “son of a dog,” in reference to Friedman’s support for settlements in the West Bank. This is a C- on the insult scale. Mahmoud Abbas, do better.

Kosher bacon: “A prominent Orthodox rabbi in Israel said that meat from a genetically cloned pig would be kosher for consumption by Jews — including when eaten with dairy products.” This could warrant a whole Talmudic tractate on its own.

The original Bozo the Clown has died: For me, there’s a lot of news in this. First of all, I thought Bozo the Clown was just like a generalized name that anyone could use for their clown name. Two, that there has been a dynasty of Bozo the Clown’s that has lasted for decades. And last, that the original was quite the yid!

News anchor stays strong: Channel 1’s Cathy Bekerman, a Jewish journalist in Colombia, was told by the newscast director that if she did not cross herself on live television, she should resign. Bekerman refused, and hopes to return to the air soon. The highlight: reluctant apologies read the same in any language.

“One of my instructions, to accentuate a piece of news that was not about religious beliefs, provoked a rejection from my colleague Cathy Bekerman. Because I feel that I affected her religious convictions without that being my purpose, I offer her a public apology,” he wrote. “May the Jewish community and other religious organizations always receive a respectful treatment from me.”

Endangered primate born at the Jerusalem Biblical Zoo: You gotta just watch this shit. Warning: will improve your day.