Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty Images for WGAw
Jeff Goldblum attends the 2017 Writers Guild Awards L.A. Ceremony at The Beverly Hilton Hotel in Beverly Hills, California, February 19, 2017.Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty Images for WGAw
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Ageless Jeff Goldblum Returning to Tired ‘Jurassic Park’ Franchise

The new film will make money, and it’ll probably be bad, but at least Goldblum will liven it up with his droll sense of humor

by
Jonathan Zalman
April 26, 2017
Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty Images for WGAw
Jeff Goldblum attends the 2017 Writers Guild Awards L.A. Ceremony at The Beverly Hilton Hotel in Beverly Hills, California, February 19, 2017.Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty Images for WGAw

At this point we might as well just accept the fact that Hollywood has decided to keep big chunks of creativity and risk in the freezer, opting instead for a seemingly endless stream of sequels and remakes and reimaginings—franchises that continue to bring in the dough despite evidence of a financial sag. Uncle! And yet, I’m also fine with it: We all need escapes every now and then, and paying 20 bucks to watch attractive humans dress up as superheroes or fight dinosaurs to forget about say, the news cycle, for two hours is a small price to pay.

Enter Jeff Goldblum—recent dad, ageless fly, alien fighter, dinosaur deterrer. Turns out that Goldblum, who hasn’t starred in a Jurassic Park-themed movie since 1997’s The Lost World, will be brought back for the sequel to Jurassic World, the Chris Pratt vehicle that grossed $1.67 billion in 2015 even though it was, ya know, a horrible film.

According to The Hollywood Reporter, Goldblum will reprise his role as Dr. Ian Malcolm, “the skeptical wisenheimer—Groucho Marx with a degree in chaos theory,” as Gabe Sanders put it. Goldblum was in the recent Independence Day reboot, which was also awful, but perhaps watchable if only because Goldblum was in it along with his over-the-top Jewy movie-dad, Judd Hirsch. Hirsch, as far as I can tell, won’t be in this flick because it’s about dinosaurs and not aliens. The film is slated for wide release next summer.

In the meantime, it appears you can find Goldblum serving sausages in Sydney.

Jonathan Zalman is a writer and teacher based in Brooklyn.

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