“Homeward Bound”: For Israel.
“The Sound of Silence”: For the Israeli left.
“50 Ways to Leave Your Lover”: For the myriad failures of the peace process.
“Loves Me Like a Rock”: That there may one day be peace at the Temple Mount.
“Mrs. Robinson”: For Mary Robinson, Israel’s favorite U.N. High Commissioner for Human Rights.
“Old Friends”: For Fatah and Hamas, apparently.
“I Am A Rock”: For Israel’s strength and the fact that it is an island of democracy in a sea of dictatorships (or, if you prefer, for Israel’s immobility and international isolation).
“One Man’s Ceiling Is Another’ Man’s Floor”: For Ehud Barak (get it, cause he’s short?).
“Keep the Customer Satisfied”: For ex-prime minister Ehud Olmert, who at least always did this in his real estate schemes.
“Still Crazy After All These Years”: For Bibi.
“Me and Julio Down by the School Yard”: For Juliano Mer-Khamis (lyrics adjusted accordingly).
“Graceland”: For the Messiah.
Marc Tracy is a staff writer at The New Republic, and was previously a staff writer at Tablet. He tweets @marcatracy.